CheapJAP

Sartorial Etiquette

Lowballing on Canal

I usually jack up the volume on my headphones when weaving through Canal Street’s not adorably clueless tourist crowds.
“Miss?! You want handbag?! Big, leather?! You want Chanel?! You want Dior?!”
Yes I want handbag, big, leather. Yes I want Chanel. Yes I want Dior. Know what I don’t want? To be conned into buying fakes by little - albeit frightening - old Asian ladies. Alas, sometimes they know just what to say to get you to stop, drop and roll out the dough.
“Van Cleef and Arpel? You like?”
My friend Kendall works at Sotheby’s; the Van Cleef and Arpels Alhambra necklace is about as big over there as the Tiffany Heart Tag toggle link necklace is for Bat Mitzvahs. Her boss owns multiple versions and colors of the Alhambra, which retails for around $350. Kendall’s boss recently let her in on a dirty little secret; she bought her Alhambras on Canal. A fake in Sotheby’s? What is the world coming to?!
The little albeit frightening old Asian lady wanted $22 for the Alhambra. I would have paid it without question if she hadn’t been yelling in my face. But I’m not one to be bullied, especially whilst shopping.
“Fifteen!” I yelled back.
“Twenty two!” she countered.
“Fifteen!” I wasn’t budging.
Then her husband got involved. He was nicer.
“Is good quality. See? Fifteen for shorter one, twenty two for longer, better quality.”
Twenty was my final offer - the couple complied. They wanted $15 for the knit hat but gave it to me for $10; clearly they were impressed by my bargaining prowess. The scarf was $10 at another stall. All told, I got three fab accessories for a whopping 40 bucks. More importantly, I conquered my fear of little old Asian ladies. Yaay.