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Coolier Than Thou

Already Over It: Uniqlo Tees

Okay, so everyone’s totally ga-ga over Uniqlo’s artist/photog-designed tees as of late. Possibly they’re just ga-ga over the ads for said artsy tees, which feature Chloe Sevigny and Japan’s version of Johnny Depp - wait for it - “portraying characters and emotions found within the t-shirts.” Acting is so deep, people. So are t-shirts.
I’m not sure if the tees I tried on at Uniqlo a few weeks ago were of the Keith Haring and Basquiat ilk; I am sure that, regardless of being reasonably priced and kind of cool, they fit like shit. Particularly for those of us with boobs, and I don’t mean Chloe’s cute little A-cups. Remember: A tee that fits you perfectly always looks classy, i.e. more expensive than it is. A tee that’s of-the-moment but ill-fitting always looks like a $16.99 shirt. Until Uniqlo’s American invasion extends to the company’s re-engineering their tees for American breasts, I’m staying off of this wagon.