CheapJAP

Splurgy Poo

The Leather Lining of the Waitressing Cloud

Aside from social intelligence and charm, both of which I obvs have in abundance, waitressing doesn’t require a whole lot of brainpower. But after working five nights out of the past six, I can say with complete confidence that it’s among the most grueling things I’ve ever done. My entire body aches, I’ve got bags under my eyes, and - despite the massive bottles of Fiji consumed throughout these evenings on my feet - I’m dehydrated to the point of icky, chapped lips. And I’ve still got four more consecutive shifts to go. This Memorial Day Weekend, the only soiree I’m throwing is a pity party. Sniffle.

Thankfully, my mounting, grouchy exhaustion has one big perk. My new serving gig nets me a ton of cash which - in my current state - I have neither the time nor the energy to spend; at the conclusion of working nine nights out of ten, I’ll have netted some serious moolah. You know what that means. It’s handbag time.

Like any good Cheap JAP, I put a lot of thought into my Splurgy Poos. While I haven’t settled on a specific, big, leather handbag, I’m leaning toward one in Recycled Leather. Not because I’d feel even remotely guilty about buying a non-eco-friendly bag - really people, don’t give me that much credit - but because recycled leather handbags are inevitably one-of-a-kind and, subsequently, Utterly Unfakeable. I checked out Ashley Watson’s line at Park Slope’s Cog & Pearl the other day and, while I wasn’t overly impressed with their selection, the bags were seriously top notch - soft, buttery, big and uber-original. I have since documented every other store in the New York Metropolitan Area that sells Ashley Watson and will be visiting these locales in search of the perfect recycled leather handbag. As soon as I get a fucking day off. Stay tuned.