Soooo, The Online Home of Vogue knows you’re like totally stressing about not being able to afford your usual Resort Collection for your end-of-summer vacay on the Amalfi Coast or whatevs. The shitty economy means no Armani, Versace, Dior or Zac Posen this year, and how sad for you! Fear not. The editorial-fashion-powers-that-be have come up with Realistic Resort Options for you from “the best little sister brands and contemporary labels that qualify as solid investments” AND don’t cost as much as a small car. Like this Development Navy-and-White Striped Coat, for instance. Now, they can’t tell you how much it actually costs – that would be crass. But Development dresses usually run around $375, so this coat can’t possibly be more than $600.

Other Resort options for the budget-conscious Recessionista include, but are not limited to: DKNY, Moschino Cheap & Chic, Marc by Marc Jacobs, Emporio Armani and Theory. At full price, of course – because waiting for things to go on sale is such a drag.

Oh Vogue. Where money’s concerned, your idiocy really is astounding. Like Smalls in “The Sandlot,” you’re killing me. Do yourselves (and us) a favor and stick to what you know (a lot about fashion, and not much else…oooh snap!) We don’t want to buy the overpriced, beautiful ridiculousness that graces your pages, even if it’s less overpriced than usual because you think you have some grasp on what real women spend on clothes. No. We just want to enjoy it!

(And maybe copy it .