On Black Friday, I shopped my ass off without leaving my parents’ house in Jersey. One might assume this means I browsed and bought via mouse and keypad. NEGATIVE. Yesterday’s shopping experience cost me zero in green. How did I achieve this feat? By helping Mommy organize her closet, of course!
My mom is a notorious [...]

What, you think Theory was the only gem uncovered at Marshalls? Puh-lease!

BCBG Sweater, originally $70. At Marshalls? $34.99. Niiiiiice.

This red, Calvin Klein dress – originally $120, found on Marshalls’ Clearance rack for $43 – is what my mom would call a Schmata (I think it’s Yiddish for sack). Yes, the dress itself is [...]

I spent my middle school years in Blue Asphalt low-rider jeans which – as I’m sure my fellow teens of the nineties know – also means I spent them with my thongs semi-exposed. NOT okay. I don’t wear low-riders anymore, but I’m still paranoid to the point that I wear long camisoles ALL THE TIME [...]

Oh Don’t EVEN! is a feature intended to disprove preconceived notions about certain retail outlets. Our current assumption: Marshalls’ brands suck.
Oh REALLY. Let’s see what I found, shall we?

Take a good, hard look at that pricetag. This shirt was originally $150. One hundred and fifty dollars for an effing button-down shirt. Yes, it’s Theory, [...]

Like most cute Freshmen, I incurred the wrath of the Cheerleading Squad for the one year I attended public high school in la Jerz. Their disdain for me specifically may or may not have had something to do with my briefly dating the quarterback. (That cliche is so priceless, I actually just LOL-ed).
It was the [...]

No one I know has enough apartment space to even throw a Holiday party, so I don’t have the pleasure of attending many. This doesn’t mean I’m immune to wanting to dress up for Holiday parties (even imaginary ones), so I did some reconnaissance at my local Forever 21s. Read: I have either seen [...]

As I was yawning my way through Vogue’s VIEW section last night, the following words jarred me awake: “Big Deals” and “Chain-store.” Hang on a sec. Now Vogue, you’re intimidatingly cutting-edge, so some of your predicted Next Big Things are a smidge beyond my amateur grasp of the avant-garde. But if I understand you correctly, [...]

The LBD is oft referred to as an Investment Piece by industry peeps who write coffee table books to con us into spending more money.
Um, negative.
I’m all for rocking a staple like a little black dress, but staple isn’t synonymous with Investment Piece.
I know this because my staple of an LBD cost me [...]

Here’s that Dana Buchman skirt I scored at Housing Works for One Whole Dollar.
This skirt’s a fairly conservative piece. So I had to badass it up a little bit with a low-cut blouse and knee-high boots.
Make it work, people. Make it WORK.
*Deer-in-headlights face sold separately.

So, it’s legit cold out again, so cold that my standard Fall evening ensemble of tights/minidress seems even more impractical than usual. Enter the legwarmer. In the past, I’ve donned the things primarily for aesthetic purposes. It wasn’t until I went outside last night and was like whoa, my LEGS are cold, that I [...]

Most people donate the clothes they no longer wear. (By “donate,” I do NOT mean take out with the trash. Don’t add to the dumpster heap that is our earth, fools). That’s the obvious, socially and environmentally responsible, post-closet purge choice. Being an inherently selfish person, I prefer to sell my duds to Beacon’s Closet [...]

Every girl loves a bargain; it should logically follow that every girl frequents her local Goodwill (and/or Salvation Army) in search of the best deals in fashion. Unfortunately, we’re used to shiny, new shit. So we’ve got an arsenal of excuses as to why we don’t patronize these beacons of thrift. And they’re all worthless [...]

As I pondered the possibility that even I – renowned shopping predator – couldn’t triumph over the beast that is Century 21, I happened upon the cocktail dress section. Some of the stuff had serious transitional, work-to-party potential. My arms laden with stuff, I met Krip at the dressing room entrance for one more [...]

My cobbler did a pretty kickass job resurrecting my destroyed leather goodies. Some Before and After pics, as proof:

Dr. Cobbler didn’t just fix the strap on my broken Botkier.
He reinforced every loose thread on the thing. He also re-heeled my gnarled Aldo motorcycle boots, like whoa. They’re totally good as new!

The [...]

When I shop with my girlfriends, I don’t do it in the traditional, let’s-both-try-on-stuff-and-lie-about-how-good-it-looks-and-silently-compete-over-who-looks-better sense of the activity. Shopping is my JOB, people; I’m obvs better at it than my girlfriends. So when I shop with a pal, I’m not so much her friend as I am her personal shopper. Finding stuff for myself is, [...]

When I was sixteen, I did something so bold, so in-your-face, so completely out of character that I hardly recognized myself after the fact. I got my nose pierced. That was eight years ago, mere moments before nose piercings were all the rage for teens and twenties alike. I’ve never been overly trendy but yowzah! [...]

Here’s the Heat-Tech Top layered under the Puffer Vest for a truly Uniqlo-riffic (ooh, that was rough) combo.
…it’s a snowbunny…it’s a frigid bitch…it’s…WINTER JAP! And she’s here to rescue you ladies from Uniqlo deprivation.
“What’s the story with Uniqlo and online shopping? I’m in TX (howdy!) and no where close to an actual store.”
From Functional [...]

I was jaunting around Soho yesterday, window shopping after my triumphant Uniqlo experience, and found myself wanting to enter every single store I passed. It wasn’t the merchandise. It was those goddamn SALE signs.
Where fashion’s concerned, there’s only one Sin City. New York is the late-night slice, the one-more drink, the bummed cigarette and [...]

In addition to the uber-practical Heat Tech Tops, Uniqlo boasts some kickass outerwear too. I took advantage of their All-Fleeces-For-$20 Promo, and snagged a reversible zip-up number as cute as the Patagonias once coveted by my boarding school besties.

I also picked up a pair of gray skinny jeans ($50) and a hooded down puffy [...]

I wasn’t initially on board with the whole Uniqlo thang; their stuff always seemed a little too minimalist/classic for my slightly ridiculous taste. But when my uber-fashion-forward pal Ellie went nutso for their Heat Tech Tops, I decided to give the brand another whirl.
Weather-wise, I’m not the most practical of shoppers. I loathe wool [...]