). Monumental? Yes. Reasonably priced? The bulk of the items are $5-$10, so Heck Yes. But what of the selection?When I’m faced with a tempting $5, $10, $15 sale of this ilk, I like to play a little game called Would I Ever Pay Full Price For That? If the answer’s Maybe or Yes, the item gets a pass. If it’s a resounding No, I don’t care how cheap it is. You’re never going to wear that shizzz.
Let’s see how the Rummage Sale fares when this exercise is applied to its offerings.
Would I ever pay $16 for a Loop Terry Halter Bra? What IS this? A bra, a top, a garment American Apparel encourages its models to wear out in public with men’s button-down shirts (unbuttoned) to reinforce the notion that wearing this brand gets you laid? A terrycloth string bikini top might support an A-cup, but that ain’t me. It’s only $2 now (shocker), but I’d give this idiotic concoction a No even if were free.
Would I ever pay $25 for California Fleece Shorts? Yet another overpriced item too slutty to wear out in public. Also, these shorts are only available in two colors: Baby blue and Red, i.e. two shades that blimp out even the tightest of buns. All $5 buys you is the appearance of a fat ass.
Would I ever pay $36 for Unisex California Fleece Track Pants? When ascribed to pants, the term Unisex can be interpreted as: shapeless enough to accommodate balls if you have them. Even a Rummage Sale price of $15 can’t change that.
Would I ever pay $16 for Loop Terry High-Rise Briefs? Again, with the fucking terrycloth. A material that makes pantylines inevitable, and you’re manufacturing underwear out of it. What am I supposed to do with these, prance around my apartment and pretend I’m at the co-ed slumber party that is the American Apparel photo shoot? I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
Would I ever pay $28 for a Unisex Flex Fleece Schoolboy Vest? Depends. Is preggers the new black?
I’ll totally cop to highlighting the worst of the worst here. The Rummage Sale merch also includes a fair amount of decent-looking basic tees in various styles, none of which I’m buying because none of them are Tri-Blend. My personal favorite, the Unisex Tri-Blend Short Sleeve Deep V-Neck, is still $22 at American Apparel’s online store.
The very same tee can be had for $9.99 at Amazon.com, a much better online option for reduced-price basics.
Say NO to the Rummage Sale, and shop there instead.
tags: 
I hate it when stores try to dupe us like that. AA’s “rummage sale.” UO’s “garage sale.” Next will be Anthropologie’s highly-anticipated, $60-a-tee, sidewalk sale bonanza.
Ahhh, thank you. I needed a chortle today, and this was just the ticket.
You are too freakin funny! Right there with you on unisex, it’s basically what happens when your pattern-maker drops the ball and the fit is unwearable. We’ve written about AA too and basically decided the whole brand is just an excuse for Dov to get off!
fyi, those eloise seamless camis from Anthropologie that you liked, I saw them on sale a couple weeks back. I think maybe they stopped making them?
What’s with all the fleece? And WHY in God’s name would you buy a pair of TERRYCLOTH PANTIES?! Are they supposed to replace a bathrobe? America Apparel never fails to…well…fail.
I’m surprised you didn’t check out the flea factory sale a couple of weekends ago. The most expensive thing there was $25 and the items they had on sale were all things you would actually wear (deep v-necks, flex fleece hoodies, slacks, u-neck dresses). The reason they were so cheap is because some of them were missing tags, others had holes (but of course you would steer clear of those), or the size was just mislabeled! T-shirts were $8, pants were reduced to $15 the second day with a few hours left in the sale. Great deals to be made. Unfortunately, I went Sunday near the end of the day and there really wasn’t anything I needed; thus, I was a smart, savvy shopper by not buying ANYTHING lest I make a purchase just because the prices were cheaper than usual.