Leather Trench Enables Matrix Fantasy

I wasn’t in the market for a leather jacket when I stopped by Beacon’s Closet yesterday afternoon. It’s not like I haven’t lusted after my fair share – I mean, c’mon – but I know better than to torture myself over things I def can’t afford.

I also know better than to look a gift horse in the mouth. I don’t know what happened as I was perusing my fave store’s coat rack, but it was some mythical shit: The seas of tweed and wool parted, and there it was. A lean mean leather dream from the uber JAPtastic Joie. Too small from the looks of it, but certainly worth a shot.

As I stuffed myself into the coat, I recalled a suede, fitted, BCBG jacket I’d once owned that resembled a potato sack after a mere six months of wear. As leather is equally stretch-prone, I figured if I could get the stiff, barely-worn Joie buttoned, I could break it in enough to wear it sans suffocation. I bought it, and spent the remainder of the afternoon in it. After a few painful hours, the coat was roomy enough that I was able to do exactly what I’d envisioned the moment I saw it: Channel Trinity and tear up the Matrix.

This coat’s retail value must have been upwards of $600, as it’s not only Joie, but also boasts double the leather of a bomber jacket. I paid $39.95, which makes this perhaps my most epic steal ever.

Hopefully this magical shopping experience rubbed off on the jacket itself, and wearing it will enable me to defy gravity and fly helicopters and stuff. Someone’s gotta fight the good fight.