Cheap JAP » Bookworm

2:30 PM • Sep 24th, 2008

By cheapjap

The Little Grey Book of BS

Oooh wait…sorry, that was the title of Nina Garcia’s first foray into the world of real, live, books. I didn’t read it. I did, however, have a momentary lapse of sanity in Barnes and Nobles a few weeks ago that resulted in my purchasing “The One Hundred: A Guide to the Pieces Every Stylish Woman Must Own.” What prompted me to give this fluff the time of day was def the “must” - I mean, it sounds scary, doesn’t it? There are ONE HUNDRED pieces out there that I MUST own?! Oh Nina, show me the way!

Turns out, the number of pieces every stylish woman must own is far from one hundred. Because, for the Cheap JAP, two of the almost-same thing means only buying one. Here’s how I’ve trimmed the list.

Nina Says: Vans AND Converse
Cheap JAP Says: One pair of cool, casual sneaks is more than enough.
The gospel according to La Nina deems Converse “the shoe that the models are always wearing when they walk out of shoots and that every downtown girl wears in her downtime.” To me, this means they should be boycotted entirely - who the eff wants to look like everyone else? Vans are a little more interesting, a lot more badass, and conjure up fond memories of my middle school skater grrl days. Sk8-Hi Special Fabric Vans, $65.

Nina Says: Caftan AND Sarongs
Cheap JAP Says: What, not everyone takes warm-weather vacations five times a year? Come on, Nina. As Sarongs look ridiculous sans beach and bikini, they’re decidedly not a piece one MUST own. Caftans (think really long muumuu) can be belted, dressed up with heels, and/or thrown on with big hoop earrings when one feels too bloated for anything else. You do the math.

Nina Says: Cable-Knit AND Cashmere
Cheap JAP Says: I’m not trying to look like a schoolteacher. I’m trying to look loaded, goddammit.
If you’ve got a penchant for preppy-chic, Cable-Knit Sweaters can be easily found at thrift stores, Goodwills, Salvation Armies et. al. But if we’re talking MUSTs here, it’s Cashmere, all the way.