CheapJAP

Navigatrix

Over the Moon for Overalls

When I happened upon the Silence & Noise Skinny Overall, I’d been searching for a pair for approximately six months. These overalls weren’t just uber-cute - they were on SALE for $39.99 (reduced from $88). This was all a few weeks ago, yet I’m only posting about them now. Why? Because it took me that long to figure out how to wear the effing things.
It wasn’t until I tried on the overalls at home that I noticed the problematic waistline. Direct your attention to Exhibit A; you’ll notice that even the model looks pear-shaped. Serious adjustment was called for, but with what?! I tried scarves and thick belts, all of which exacerbated the situation. I needed to go smaller and subtler, not draw more attention to the problem.

Finally, I unbuttoned the back and realized that shoelaces could be looped through the button holes, then tied around front to cinch the waist. Crisis averted. Phew.
Paired with a cashmere shrug scored at the Scarehouse Sale and Mom’s Frye Boots, these trendy overalls are a far cry from their farmer-chick inspiration.

While the trial and error process of fitting these to my bod kept them from being a total waste, there’s a lesson to be learned here. Thirty seconds is not an adequate amount of dressing room time to assess whether or not your fab find is worth buying. Wiggle around in it, strike a pose, and make sure it doesn’t make you look like a bloated piece of fruit before you commit, mmkay? Mmkay.

Economic Shitstorm

Alias Premium Denim: Free for Me, Cheap for You

I was initially going to review the pair of Alias Premium Denim Jeans sans mentioning they were sent to me, free of charge. Then I had a guilt attack.

I figured if the jeans sucked, I’d send them back and no one would be the wiser. Alas, they sooo don’t suck. They actually rock. I’d rather recommend them to you and fess up to the fact that they cost me nada than maintain the perception that I pay for everything on my own dime. So there that is. OMG, that was so cathartic!

My only beef with these jeans is that they’re a bit ass-crack-tastic (then again, I might only feel that way because I’m into the high-waisted thang as of late). Secure them with a belt to avoid revealing any undergarment that might inspire a shitty R&B song. I don’t love the squiggly logo on the butt; I do love how the denim flatters said butt.

Even though the cut and wash aren’t my personal taste, I still gotta give Alias the Cheap JAP seal of approval: These $40 jeans fit and feel like a $150 pair, and henceforth meet the shop-cheap-look-loaded standard nicely. Kudos to the gals behind the brand for giving us a way to opt out of overpriced denim and still look hot.

Economic Shitstorm

The Cheap Jean Scene

It was only when I started getting unsolicited compliments on my Forever 21 jeans that I let go of my inner label whore enough to wear them with pride. Now look, I heart JAPtastic denim as much as the next brand snob, but not enough to pony up $200 every time I want new pants. Here’s how to navigate the world of low-cost jeans without looking like a wannabe or (gasp!) even remotely cheap.

Beware the Back Pocket

Know why brands like True Religion, Citizens of Humanity, Joe’s, Sevens, et. al. get to charge upwards of $200 for their goods? Because of that label you’re so eager to slap on your ass. In an effort to compete with coveted labels, reasonably priced denim companies often attempt to mimic horseshoes, JJ’s and such; buying into this is akin to ponying up for a fake Louis Vuitton on Canal.

With cheap jeans, simplicity is queen; the less design-y crap, the better. DKNY and Levi’s know how to not junk up the trunk. Levi’s 505 Straight-Leg Jean, $34.99; DKNY Stretch Soho Boot Cut Jean, $59.99

Mind the GAP

The GAP’s apparel bores me to tears, but they’ve been making reasonably priced jeans for years - Respect. And where style and fit are concerned, they’ve come a loooong way.

If you’re one of those paranoid jean freaks who believe cost relates to quality, these are for you: Still under $100 and totally well-made.

GAP Super Bell Jeans, $78; GAP Grey Trouser Jeans, $69.50.

Color Me Trendy
Jeans embellished with rhinestones, zippers and/or glitter tend to always look trashy, be they Versace or Bebe. Conversely, colored denim and/or trendy jean styles (uber-high-waisted, super flare, baggy boyfriend, etc.) look fab on the cheap.

It is generally considered unwise to purchase expensive experimental denim, as hot pink jeans probs won’t do it for you next year. Go to funkytown with Forever 21 instead.

Forever 21 High-Waist Straight Leg Jean, $22.80; Forever 21 Ria Skinny Jean, $29.80.

Classics Rock
Some brands are above trends and/or the temptation to jack their prices; they remain timeless, and eternally cool. Calvin Kleins, Levi’s, and Guess - the upside-down triangle era Guess - come to mind. Heart these eighties throwbacks here.

GUESS Beverly Jean, $89.

I Love A Good Story

Dressed Up to Get Lucky - Outfit #3

Before we discuss my third - and possibly best - entry for Lucky’s “My Denim Transformation” Stylist Challenge, let’s talk about this blazer. Last January on my birthday, my uber fab mother and I hit Fisch for the Hip, where she immediately zeroed in on this Marc Jacobs number. Originally priced at $600 or so, it was still a splurge at its re-sale price. While I can’t recall the exact number, it had to have been offensive enough that Mom had to physically force me out of my coat and into the garment. I pretended not to want it; she pretended not to hear me.

“It’s your birthday,” she hissed at the time, “You will thank me later.” Of course, she was right. So thank you Mommy, for forcing this MJ blazer upon me on my 24th birthday. (If I wasn’t a stereotype before that last sentence…)

To my label whore’s dream of a blazer (and to the same F21 jeans, obvs), I added the following:

BCBG teal, ruched tank (snagged for $19 at the Atlantic City Outlets); bizarreslashunique, pearl button-embellished, gray sweater tank (Beacon’s Closet, like ten bucks); clip-on rhinestone/faux onyx earrings (P.S. Flea Market, $5); Guess pumps I’ve had fo eva (fo eva meaning two years plus).

I think we have a winner here, dolls. Your thoughts?

I Love A Good Story

Dressed Up to Get Lucky - Outfit #2

Mmmkay, here’s another look in the spirit of Lucky Mag’s Dress Up Your Denim Challenge. (With the same Forever 21 jeans, in the spirit of Cheap JAP).

Jacket, Ralph Lauren Purple Label, (a gift!); Lace top, Goodwill, $12.99.

Boots, MICHAEL Michael Kors, $295 (Oy!); “Chanel” clip-ons, thieved from Mom’s jewelry drawer, $0.

I’m not sure if it’s dressy enough to fit the bill. Probs because I’m not showing much skin, and I never really feel dressed up if I’m not showing any skin. This tendency will not bode well for me once I’m in my thirties.

I am sure that it rocks. Then again, it’s rare that I don’t feel that way about my outfits. Convincing yourself that THIS outfit is the BEST OUTFIT EVER every time you get dressed requires a zen-like focus, but it’s a pretty nifty trick once you’ve mastered it.

I should also mention that said trick requires a penchant for delusion and a slightly crazed obsession with material things. I’m just saying.

I Love A Good Story

Dressed Up to Get Lucky - Outfit #1

Mmkay, here’s one of my possible entries for Lucky Mag’s My Denim Transformation Contest. I’ve dressed up my fabulously cheap Forever 21 jeans ($24.99) not only to keep my outfit Cheap JAPtastic, but also because these totally budget thangs continually snag me more compliments than any of my brand name pairs. The components of the outfit include the following:

Diane von Furstenberg top, (purchased years ago, in honor of my 21st birthday party; worn once since then i.e. I’m an ass), price upon request; Bebe fur-collared cardigan, Beacon’s Closet, $10.95.

Celine peep-toe platform pumps, (purchased five-plus years ago, suffered broken heel two years ago, salvaged by heroic cobbler one year ago), over $400 - Dad almost cut up the gold card in front of my face; beaded necklace, P.S. 321 Flea Market, $3.

And now, I bring you…

Dressed-up denim entry numero uno!

A heinously expensive blouse and a pair of overpriced pumps could transform any pair of under-$30 jeans. What’s so impressive about these F21’s is that they don’t even look cheap to begin with.

I wonder if I’ll lose points for having my hair in my face/ trying to look really, really cool. I’m thinking probs.

More potential entries en route!

Cheap JAP 101

Lucky Mag, Lucky Jeans, Lucky Girl

As much as I periodically bash Lucky, it’s one of the few fashion mags I actually read, and the only one I occasionally enjoy. I also enjoy contests or, more specifically, winning them. So I’m entering Lucky’s latest, and I’m going for the W.

The “My Denim Transformation” Challenge involves one seemingly simple objective: Dress up your jeans for a big night out. It’s something most of us do all the time. Alas, it’s something few of us do well, myself included. I rarely wear jeans for a big night out, not because I’m a diva who doesn’t feel dressed up unless she’s in a dress…(Oh, wait…). I avoid jeans when I go out because they go with EVERYTHING: This abundance of options overwhelms me to the point where, after an hour of trying on outfits, I inevitably change out of the jeans and into something less versatile, like a jumper. I’m taking this challenge so I can take my jeans out on the town. (Also, to win - see prizes).

Deadline for entry is November 4th. I’ll be posting three possible outfits in hopes that you beotches will weigh in on which one’s the winner. If you want to give me a run for my money, send pics of your entries to cheapjap@gmail.com and I’ll publicize your stylistic prowess. It’s gametime.

Splurgy Poo

Success at the Scarehouse Sale

Here’s the full report on the damage Mom and I did at Barney’s Warehouse Sale. When I hit sales of the Barney’s ilk, I ask myself the following question before committing to a particular item: Would I still want this if it wasn’t on sale? This ensures that I’m not duped into buying solely because it’s a good deal. Newsflash, ladies: Buying something at 75% off doth not equate to saving money. Spending less might give you peace of mind, but - let’s not kid ourselves - it’s still spending. Just make sure you waste your dough wisely (if that makes any sense).

This beige shrug isn’t just a fab layering piece that’ll get me through many Falls and Winters to come. It’s also 100% cashmere. Yummy. $495 is an utterly absurd price to pay for a top; $249 isn’t much better. But $119 for the kind of quality and versatility that’s eternally In? That I can do.

I’ve been on the hunt for straight-leg rocker jeans for quite some time now. The subtle vertical stripe on these on Superfines is a nice touch, and the slight flare at the ankle means they can be worn with heels sans excessive bunching - they actually manage to be more JAPtastic than hipster. Superfines usually retail for around $180; these were $99. Me likey.

This gray, cashmere blend sweater has a sexy, low-cut back and feels like pajamas. Basically, I’ll live in it.

At $69, it was probs the cheapest thing at the Barney’s Warehouse Sale. So it’s only fitting that it now belongs to me

Label Whore

More Brands at Beacon’s

You’re probs sick of hearing about Beacon’s Closet. Tough nuts. If you know of another store that sells JAPtastic denim for $24.95, I’m all ears. But as it stands, when I want serious brands at a quarter of their original price, Beacon’s never fails to deliver.

These are Hudson Jeans which, like their overpriced kin, usually retail for around $180. Based on their awesomeness, $24.95 seems too cheap, almost unbelievably so. But the tags don’t lie, people. The tags don’t lie.

Label Whore

The Return of the Denim Snob

Where JAPtastic denim is concerned, I’ve come a long way, baby. I’ve put to rest the inevitable shame of wearing Forever 21 high-waisted jeans; I’ve even come to enjoy the freedom of denim experimentation encouraged by not spending $200 on every pair. I’m not above secondhand Sevens, I’m no longer starved for Rich and Skinny, and my $14.95 Picadilly jeans from Beacon’s make my butt look better than AG ever could. And yet.

I’m still not above being wooed by designer denim, and Tokio 7 had it in abundance. The second I put these Diane von Furstenberg jeans on, my butt looked like it’d done 500 squats. Aside from their being the most flattering pair I’ve owned like, ever, they’re 95% cotton and 5% elastane, which basically means they fit and feel like yoga pants. DE-lish.

I assumed the jeans were from at least a few seasons ago, as DVF denim retails from $250 to $400 and these were priced at $75. Not that I cared. The fact that they’re from her Spring ‘08 line and, after being originally priced at $345, are now “on sale” for $172.50, is just the cream cheese icing on the red velvet cupcake. Half-off denim is generally a bargain, but when it’s DVF you’re dealing with, you’re still paying the equivalent of full-price Citizens. Not cool.

Now, I’m no good with percentages, but basic subtraction tells me that paying $75 for $345 jeans means I spent $270 less than the average denim snob. Net-A-Porter, you lose!

Cheap JAP 101

Fashion Myths: Denim Trends

Sooo it’s almost August, which means it’s time to freak out about Fall Denim. What ever will you do with the the Boyfriend, the Wide Leg, the Bold Color and the Super Skinny styles of yesteryear?! Are they all, like, sooo last season? Fear not, my little chickies. Jeans are a worthy splurge for a reason: Even the trendier styles stay In, season after season. Unfortunately, brand-whoring fashion mags like to use different names for the same thing to dupe you into buying more jeans (as IF your JAPtastic ass doesn’t already own ten uber-In pairs). Here’s a guide to the adjective-heavy denim “trends” designed to make you second guess what’s in your closet. [Thanks in advance to Lucky and ELLE for regurgitating each other’s style tips].

Lucky How To Wear Your Denim Guide, 2008 - Sleek Silhouette
ELLE Denim Trends Fall 2007 - The Skinny Jean
Lucky’s also a fan of Super-Skinny Jeans - apparently, slapping on a superlative distinguishes the trend from ELLE’s Skinny Jean of 2007. The Lucky eds suggest pairing a fitted, sleeveless top with skinny jeans to achieve the Sleek Silhouette look; those of us with boobs know the potential slut-factor of going tight all over. To each her own.
Continue reading →

Navigatrix

Bottoms Up at Forever 21

Shopping cheap can be really freeing sometimes - at least that’s what I tell myself when I forgo Bikram yoga for field research, which is often.

Had I seen these suspender-jeans in a pricey boutique, I would have looked at them longingly, convinced myself of their impracticality and left empty-handed. But in the blinding florescence of Forever 21, I saw the notion of suspender-jeans in a new light (and one that only cost $29.80 ;)). They were so unlike anything I owned, borderline ridiculous even. I was obvs buying them immediately.

(Note: Suspender-jeans should fit loosely around the waist and butt area, otherwise, there’d be no need for the suspenders to hold up the jeans (duh). Don’t go a size down or they’ll really look silly.)

Life’s all about balance, so I paired the loose, wide-leg suspender-jeans with an old, fitted Theory top (fine, and a push up bra…no one’s are that perky). Heels are also a must for this look, particularly for shorties like me.

I don’t know if suspender-jeans incur wrath or merit praise from the fashion gods. I do know I don’t give a shit. Continue reading →

Navigatrix

The Top Five Reasons to Endure Century 21

Yesterday, after extensive iPhone camera-snapping and note-taking, I came to the following conclusion: Century 21 is a Cheap JAP’s dream…provided she has the shoppers’ stamina to survive the experience (and I thought I wasn’t an athlete!). The Top Five Reasons that make this store worth your while - read on.

1. The Denim
After observing the dynamic selection of denim styles and brands, I see no reason to pay full price for JAPtastic jeans ever again. I’m not effing kidding. Joe’s, AG’s, Paper Denim, Hudson, J Brand - you name it, it’s there. And it’s usually at least half of what you’d normally pay. Eek!

3. The OMFG Shoe Section

The shoes at Century 21 are the shit. The big cheese. The holy grail of discount designer shopping. The cheaper stuff and new arrivals are upstairs - while I usually don’t have a problem ponying up a Benjamin for some hot Stevens, it’s nice to know they can be had for $60 or less. But the downstairs is truly where it’s at. I’m talking Chloe, Giuseppe Zanotti, Celine, Marc Jacobs - the best of the best. Did I want to kick myself for buying $115 Dolce Vitas after I saw their high-end Chloe inspiration on sale for $119? You bet.

Continue reading →

I Love A Good Story

The Perils of South Jersey Boutiques

I kid you not - South Jersey boasts the kind of JAPtastic boutiques that rival the best of Soho. Like my fellow hometown JAPs, I once used the, “What, there’s no sales tax!” excuse to rationalize shopping at such places. My friend Sarah still does. When she mentioned she’d hit Knit Wit - probs the most awesomely expensive boutique I’ve ever shopped - she did so with a wicked smirk on her face.

Sarah donned her purchases for drinks Saturday night. To anyone with an undiscerning eye, she was wearing jeans and a white t-shirt. But my razor-sharp JAPdar went on label-alert; she looked too good to have not spent a bundle on her outfit. The jeans were, unsurprisingly, J Brand and - after seeing them in person - I can’t blame Sarah for staying true to her denim snob instincts. They are that fabulous.

When I inquired after the tee and Sarah pretended not to hear me, I knew something was up. I asked again.

-Sarah, is the tee Knit Wit too?
-I can’t even talk about it.
-Why? Did you seriously spend $60 on a white t-shirt?
-Worse. You’re going to kill me. Continue reading →

Coolier Than Thou

It’s a Legging, It’s a Jean, It’s…Denim Leggings!

For the record: I’m well aware that these pants are, at first glance, utterly ridiculous. When I saw them in American Apparel I initially balked at the price. Forty-two dollar leggings. Really. REALLY? What could possibly be so special about American Apparel leggings that made them nearly fifty bucks? They had the appearance of denim, but they weren’t technically jeans. They had a trendy high waist, but were too tight for a tucked-in shirt. Who in their right mind would wear such a thing?

Me, as it turns out. Obvs.

Under normal circumstances, the mere idea of tucking anything into leggings is as silly as it is slutty. But these aren’t your average leggings; the polyester/nylon/elasthan combo makes legs look thinner than they actually are, yet the material is still thick enough to hide everything from thong lines to cellulite. This is not to imply that denim leggings are easy to pull off. If you’re feeling even remotely self-conscious and/or bloated (I find that the two often go hand in hand, no?) parade around your apartment in them before taking them out on the town.

The first outfit pictured is a tad ho-fo-sho for my taste, but it proves that a thin shirt can be tucked into the DLs without incident (BTdubs, the shirt’s a James Perse, snagged for $11.95 at Beacon’s; the shoes are Manolos, courtesy of The United Bank of Mommy).

The second outfit uses a loose top (also American Apparel) to balance the tight pants and, as a result, is a bit more classy (though “class” isn’t the first thing that comes to mind where denim leggings are concerned). It also exemplifies why I bought the pants in the first place. Because - as bizarre as they are - they make me feel like a fucking rock star.

So much so that I can’t help but make ugly-rock-star-faces every time I put them on.