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Adventures in Etsy: Rockford Peach

Cheap JAP launches Rockford Peach vintage handpicked apparel and accessories. Highlights: a 1960s Bonnie Cashin rain cape, a 1970s Lanvin shirt dress and a vintage handmade purple leather and suede fringed skirt.

Valentine’s Day Vintage Baubles, via Etsy

Why should you buy yourself a bauble on Valentine’s Day, in lieu of waiting for a man to bestow one on you? Because the vast majority of dudes have – how do I say this delicately – questionable taste in jewelry. And by questionable, I mean utterly piss poor.

I got a necklace from my college boyfriend once – gold intertwined deer antlers speckled with tiny gems. My best friend told me I looked like I was going hunting with Bjork. She was absolutely right.

Doesn’t matter how well he knows you or how long he’s been dating you. Doesn’t matter if you’ve been married to him for twenty-nine years. After decades of failure, my father finally realized giving Mom something she’d actually wear meant sacrificing the element of surprise. He wants to buy her jewelry; he has her pick out what she wants. Smart strategy.

Oh, and I don’t want to hear any crap about how your man is the exception to the rule or whatever. If he knows how to buy jewelry for you, (I mean, to the point of finding you something as good or better than what you’d buy for yourself) then he’s either wisely attuned to you dropping extensive hints on the matter, or… maybe not totally hetero. Yes, that’s a mammoth and possibly offensive generalization, but cliches don’t just appear out of thin air (aaaand there’s another one.)

You’re single, you say?

Good. You get to bask in the glory of not having to pretend you like what he bought you.

This Valentine’s Day, single, attached or otherwise, let’s all indulge in a little self-appreciation. Some

Vintage Sterling Silver X Earrings, $8.00; Vintage Avon Red Heart Earrings, $7.00.

Five Fab Leg Warmers

Winter is a happy time of year for those obsessed with eighties cold weather accessories a la moi. I’m talking, of course, about leg warmers.

If you’re down with the leg warmer thang and need a versatile, budget-friendly recommendation,

The best part? The wrist cuffs are included!
Spiky Fur Leg Warmer and Wristlet Set, Candy Kiss Couture, $35.00.