The Top Five Lamest Excuses for Not Shopping at Goodwill

Every girl loves a bargain; it should logically follow that every girl frequents her local Goodwill (and/or Salvation Army) in search of the best deals in fashion. Unfortunately, we’re used to shiny, new shit. So we’ve got an arsenal of excuses as to why we don’t patronize these beacons of thrift. And they’re all worthless and weak. (Now drop and give me twenty!).

“They don’t have the brands I like.”
Really. So you don’t like Laundry, Tahari, Bebe, Club Monaco, J.Crew, Banana Republic, GAP, H&M, BCBG, et. al? Goodwill’s got brands to burn – you just gotta look, lazy face. The fact that my Goodwill’s in NYC doesn’t necessarily mean it has a better selection than yours; New York is home to the savviest of stylemongers, so you can bet my finds have already been picked through by other beotches. And I STILL score.

“I mean, those are, like, other people’s clothes.”
No shit Sherlock. Lots of you who won’t deign to shop at Goodwill either have or would donate your old clothes to the same place. Wouldn’t people be lucky to buy and wear the fab stuff you’ve tired of? I thought so. Yes, there’s an abundance of worn-out, fugly apparel. But there’s also tons of clothing about as worn-in as – and I’m projecting here – that pricey, going-out top you *needed* that still has its tags. (We all have that top, btw .

“It’s too disorganized for me to find anything.”
Okay, I kind of feel you on this. Kind of. Goodwill doesn’t care if you’re a Forever 21 or a Juicy Couture or a Theory – you’re all going to hang together in harmony, regardless of where you came from or what you originally cost. And in this way, it’s the great equalizer of all things Fashion. Being forced to sift through things not according to trend or brand but according to category and color illuminates something the Industry banks on you never realizing: It’s all just stuff. In one world, it’s a pastel, cable-knit, Theory sweater. In another, it’s just a pink top. And it’s in the pink top section with all the other pink tops.

“The clothes are DIRTY – eew!”
Of course they’re dirty. Do YOU make the effort to wash the stuff sitting in the back of your closet before you donate it? Me either. For Goodwill, I like to employ the same rule I use when buying thongs at Old Navy, regardless of how almost-clean anything looks: Wash before you wear. Duh.

“There’s not one near me.”
Au contraire! Finding a store with this nifty Goodwill Locator is easy-peasy. If you happen to live 2 miles west of Bumblefuck, check out shopgoodwill.com.

*All of the above obvs applies for Salvation Army too – see the Salvation Army Store Directory to find one near you.